Just on here to make a public service announcement to everyone that it is currently sunflower season at Trader Joes (aka the best time of the year). I have to tell myself to only buy one bouquet even though my heart wants them all. Sunflowers have a special place in my heart for many reasons: the brightness of yellow, the remembrance of my late grandfather, and the way they always face the sun. I’ve researched them so much that the knowledge of them made them become a symbol of strength during hard times and a comfort during the gloomy days. To not bore you with too many facts about sunflowers, I’ll just tell you the major ones that have influenced me to believe they are so much more than a flower. First, a sunflower has a sun-tracing behavior called heliotropism meaning the head of the flower follows the sun throughout the day as it goes across the sky. How cool is that!? No matter what is going on around them during the day they are always facing the sun. How symbolic of the choice we have in our everyday lives; choosing to look at the good as opposed to the bad. The second fact is how the center of the sunflower is actually made up of a thousand little tiny flowers. This reminds me that just like God knows every tiny floret on the circumference of a sunflower, so does God say he knows every hair on my head (Luke 12:17). In addition, maturing sunflowers towards the end of their lives end up facing the east to get the most sunlight out of their final days. I can’t help but make a connection with the sunflowers eastward facing at the end of their lives to the prophecy of Jesus’ return through the Eastern Gate (Zechariah 14:3-4).
I could go on for days about these flowers, but I must pause to tell you another renewed mindset that came about through some gossip. The other day I was enjoying some sun out at our community pool while reading a new book (or shall I say reading the same few sentences over and over again because ya girl can’t focus). I really shouldn’t be so determined to read at the pool, knowing that I have a tendency to be a golden retriever when I see someone I know. As I’m rereading, a handful of people come over surrounding me in my pool float. This is not unusual, and the golden retriever in me is not alarmed at all until they inform me of something that was said. Before I tell you, I must preface that I have a tendency to be naive when it comes to friendships. I trust very easily, assuming the best intentions from all people I encounter. In this situation, I was informed that I misread a friendship. I had shared to this person that I had a podcast where I read aloud the self-help book I had written many years ago. (I will share more about that book/podcast later but for now just know I am proud of it while also seeing how much my mindset has been renewed since then). They went on to inform me that this person I had shared with had played a minute or two of my podcast while hanging out with them and began to laugh saying how cringy it all was. As they surrounded me telling me this information my heart sank, but not in the way I thought it would. There was a moment of hurt and anger wondering how any person could be so heartless to make fun of something shared in vulnerability and I could tell the people around me were wanting to support me in any negative talk I needed about the person to help soothe my hurt. But this wasn’t my reaction at all. I don’t know how to explain my next reaction other than I felt a great sense of peace. I responded with how sad it was to hear and how I had no need to talk further about the situation. Because honestly I didn’t. How would gossiping serve either one of us or our audience? I am the first to point out how cringy it is to hear your voice on audio, but I also know how brave it is to share one’s thoughts in a public way with the hopes that it might help someone in a similar situation.
This was a blessing in disguise. A wake up call if you will; a lesson I honestly think God is trying to teach this people-pleaser. You can’t trust everyone Kylie and that’s ok. Not everyone is meant to be your friend. Apostle Paul even writes this in 2 Corinthians 6:14 “Do not be unequally yoked with unbelievers. For what partnership has righteousness with lawlessness? Or what fellowship has light with darkness?” Which brings me back to sunflowers. The final fact I will share with you is about what sunflowers do at night without the sun to follow. They face each other. They face ones like them, ones that radiate the same warmth they do to sustain them during dark times. If I didn’t have friendships who share the same faith as me, I’m not sure I would have reacted with such calmness. So with this interaction I leave with a renewed mindset about friendship. You can be kind to everyone but not everyone is entitled to your friendship. Even Jesus only shared with and entrusted in a small circle.
Proverbs 13:20 – “Whoever walks with the wise becomes wise, but the companion of fools will suffer harm”
Sincerely a distant friend,
Kylie
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